How to Get People to Share More About Themselves
If you want to create an environment for others to share more about themselves, start by sharing about yourself genuinely and not for attention. When you share appropriately for the setting and context of your relationship, others will feel more comfortable doing the same. Lead with this intention and let it inform how you shape each conversation.
Why is it important for someone to feel comfortable sharing more about themselves?
Build trust and deepen connections
In romantic and personal relationships, creating a space where others feel comfortable sharing is essential to building trust and deepening your connection, no matter the stage of the relationship. With a deeper connection comes mutual understanding and security to strengthen your bond, making it easier to navigate obstacles and grow together.
Promote authenticity and emotional intimacy
When someone feels comfortable sharing, they can show up as their authentic self. Being your authentic self means that someone doesn’t have to know you intimately (a new friend, for example) but they should know you honestly. Meaning, that if you’re comfortable with who you are and you’re bringing the fullness of that version of yourself to any conversation, people will get to experience you authentically.
Improve conflict resolution and foster growth
Comfortable and vulnerable sharing leads to more constructive discussions and resolutions, even if it’s only resolving to agree to disagree. By sharing perspectives and feelings honestly, partners take a collaborative approach to finding solutions that address both their needs.
4 tips to get people to share more about themselves
1. Name that it’s a safe space or a judgement-free zone
At the beginning of your conversation, state out loud that this is a safe and judgment-free space. This simple acknowledgement can set the tone for the conversation and encourage openness.
2. Be vulnerable where appropriate
Don’t make sharing one-sided. Share your own stories and insights in ways that create a balanced exchange and add to the conversation. There’s a delicate balance of listening to understand and not to override or “one up” someone else’s stories, and sharing your experiences in a genuine way. Vulnerability in context shows others that it’s ok to open up.
3. Make listening the foundation of your interactions
Active listening is the golden rule of all communication: listen to understand, not to respond. When you listen attentively and respond in ways that make the other person feel seen and heard, you create a space where they feel valued and are more likely to share openly.
Trust, connection, emotional intimacy and conflict resolution are the foundation for growth in any relationship. That foundation relies on feeling seen and heard in ways that allow each person to show up as their authentic selves. It only takes one person to create this dynamic – will it be you?
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For more information on my ‘Ask Better Questions to Build Better Connections’ workshop, click here.
